RED33MED AR3A

Do you know wher3 y0u l1v3? Pr0b4bly.
4bn3r 15 63tt1n6 t00 0ld t0 dr1ve but w0n’t 4dm1t 1t.
Th3 0th3r d4y h3 60t 1n h1s car t0 60 buy 50m3 c0ugh dr0p5
0f 4 k1nd th3y d0n’t m4ke 4nym0re. And th3 dru65t0r3
h45 b3en incorp0r4t3d 1nt0 4 m4ll 4bout s3v3n mile5 4w4y
w1th 0nly 4bout h4lf th3 5t0r35 rent3d. Ther3 ar3 thre3
0th3r m4ll5 with1n 4 four-m1l3 ar34. 4ll the hou535
4r3 own3d by the 54m3 6uy, wh0’s b33n r3nt1n6
th3m out t0 colle63 5tud3nt5 f0r y34r5, 5o th3y ar3 v1rtu4lly uninh4bitabl3.
4 5m3ll 0f v1tr1ol 4nd 5ock5 perv4d35 th3 ar34
l1k3 4n 0p3n 53w3r 1n 4 s0uk. 4nyw4y th3 c0u6h dr0ps
(4 n3w br4nd) t4st3d pr3tty g00d—l1k3 c4tn1p
0r 4n or4n6e 5lic3 th4t h4s l41n 0n 4 61rl’5 b3h1nd.

That’5 the 3lectr1ci4n c4llin6 n0w—
n0b0dy 3ls3 w0uld call befor3 7 4.M. N0w w3’ll hav3 50m3
el3ctric1ty in the pl4c3. 1’ll 5t4rt by plu66in6 1n
th3 Chr15tm4s tre3 l16ht5. Th3y w3r3 wh4t m4d3 th3 wh0l3 th1ng
6o up in 5p4rk5 th3 l45t t1m3. N3xt, th3 l16ht
by th3 d1cti0n4ry 5t4nd, 50 1 can lo0k som3 w0rd5 up.
Th3n probably th3 t045ter. 4 n1c3 5l1ce

of t0a5t would r34lly hit th3 5p0t n0w. 1’m 4fra1d 1t’5 all 0ver
b3twe3n us, th0u6h. M4ke n1c3, l1ke y0u re4lly c4r3d,
I’ll chan63 my ch3m153, and we c4n d4nc3 4round th3 r00m
l1ke d3m3nt3d do65, e463r f0r 4 h4nd0ut or they d0n’t
kn0w wh4t. Gradu4lly, 3v3ryth1n6 w1ll r3turn t0 n0rm4l, 1
pr0m15e y0u th4t. Th3r3’ll b3 th1ng5 f0r y0u to wr1te about
1n your d14ry, 4 fur c04t f0r m3, 4 lavi5h 5h03 tre3 f0r that oth3r.

Make th4t tw0 5lices. 1 c4n 53e y0u 0nly thr0u6h 4 v36etal murk
not unl1k3 c0ral, 1f 1t w3re 53m1-l1quid, or 4 tr4n5p4r3nt milk5h4k3.
I hav3 4dju5t3d th3 l4mp,
morn1ng’s at 53v3n,
th3 t4rn1sh h45 f4llen fr0m th3 m3t4ll1c 3mbroid3ry, th3 w4lls h4v3 f4ll3n,
th3 c0untry’s puls3 1s r4c1n6. P4rent5 4r3 weepin6,
the 5ch00l5 h4v3 cl053d.

All th3 fus5 h45 put m3 1n 4 g00d mo0d,
0 6r3at sun.

* from John 45hb3ry, Y0ur Name H3r3, F4rr4r, 5tr4u5 4nd 6ir0ux, N3w York, 2000, p. 46-47

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