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21 years ago I saw my dead grandmother, naked & lying on her right side where the cancer started. That was the second time I saw her pubic hair. The first time was when I was five. Old men were trying to wrap her pale stomach in white silk. They struggled with the unexpected heavinessContinue reading “Birthday letters #4 (The Blue Flannel Suit #2)”

I saw my dead grandmother, nakedxxxlying on her sidexxxxxxwhere the cancerstarted.xxxOld menxxxxxxwrapped her pale stomachin white silk.xxxThey struggledxxxxxxwith the unexpected heavinessof her corpse.xxxShe was three hours deadxxxxxxand alreadyI had to say goodbye.xxxToo young to understandxxxxxxtoo old to cry.The only thingxxxI could doxxxxxxxwas turnmildewed Koran tapesxxxoverxxxxxxon the silver Toshiba.

Dark housesAn architect’s fear of light Dreams of EnglandNarrow stairs Cold cubiclesNo bath

An émigré’s shock of the newxxxis nothingcompared to his repulsionxxxa year on xxxof the now familiar.

Straws like bullets / in his back pocket / cold water / in his hand / like a grenade—Plastic cups of water in his hands / cold / like hand grenades— For a thousand rupiahsyou can geta fully grown manto run around trafficof heavy steellike a childplaying tagsshort strawspacked like bulletsin his back pocketplastic cupsContinue reading “Studies for a street scene (macan tutul bok!)”

In the morning the sun is blueCold it’s early summerNo one caresIf the cream sand has waited The whole of JulyPlus a good part of AugustOr if it’s timeNowFor him to dig Exit tunnelsFor hybernating beach towels.

Go into a cornerYour vantage pointLookoutOver our historyAnd seeIf I haven’t been nothingBut the total oppositeOf what I’ve always claimed to be.

Only one of us will be marriedTo a girl who loves you moreThan there are fluffs of pollenIn the glare of SeptemberYou!

Like one day in the cinemaI was watching King KongAnd I kept trying to avoid reading the subtitlesAll through the action scenes.

Cerita ini terjadi waktu dia masih muda. 32 tahun. Waktu itu dia bekerja di sebuah perusahaan minyak sebagai seorang géologis, lulusan ITB dengan IP 2. Waktu magang pas semester terakhir di perusahaan yang sama, direktur HRD di situ, seorang ibu setengah baya dengan gaun bunga dan sabuk besar tinggi di atas pusar, memergokinya membaca Olenka.Continue reading “Cerita super pendek 30 tahun yang akan datang tentang Nirwan Déwanto 20 tahun yang lalu”