Two Girls & Me

S.M. Ardan

 

I’m just waiting until I get paid
Then I’ll ask Girl Number One out for dinner
We’ll eat & drink
Smell the roses in the evening air
If the weather is fine
We’ll talk about love

My head feels heavy, & my chest,
& my pockets & my stomach empty
I’ll go visit Girl Number Two at her house
We’ll talk
& love’s all around us, in the air, inside us
& stays on the tips of our tongues
As we sip tea and crunch fried peanuts between our teeth

Once I get paid, believe me,
I will go to Girl Number One’s wedding
We’ll shake hands,
My hands will be shaking.
She will say, “I do.”
The rain will clear.

In the morning I will buy two bags of lollies
I will scatter them over the grave of Girl Number Two
The red soil will be wet
And with the rest of the money in my pocket
I will fly to Menteng and drown in my own sorrows
Alone.

If someone would give me some money for this poem
I will ask Girl Number One and her husband to go see a movie
Or out for dinner at a restaurant
Then, with the rest of my money I will buy flowers, I’ll scatter them over Girl Number Two’s grave
And I will drown myself
In total solitude.

(1952)

2 thoughts on “Two Girls & Me

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